Archive for July, 2009
Summing up game thread: July 12, Braves at Rockies
“Hi, this is Braves blogger Mac Thomason. So, what are we dealing with here? Well, our worst hitters play left field and first base, our biggest power threat hits leadoff, our shortstop is leading the team in RBI even though he got benched for a week for general douchiness, the offense of late has been carried by a man who started the year as the second-string utility infielder, our hotshot rookie CF spent two months on the team without ever revealing that he might have a broken wrist, our cleanup hitter found out a month into the season that he needs glasses, we have two pitchers in the top ten in ERA and both of them have losing records, our putative ace has the worst ERA in the rotation, three relievers are on pace to challenge a team record in appearances, and some people wonder if our Hall of Fame manager has Alzheimer’s. On the other hand, Francoeur is now a Met. Call it even.”
Don Sutton, Blog Accountability Cop game thread: July 11, Braves at Rockies
Hello, this is Baseball Hall of Famer Don Sutton again. I have noticed that there continues to be a lack of accountability around here. Some persons have continued to make unfounded statements based solely on facts rather than the opinions of those who played the game. This will not stand. Others have attacked the judgments of scouts, the backbone of the game. In a civilized society, this would be grounds for imprisonment. Furthermore, some people have insulted the acumen of my former colleague Joe Simpson. Keep it up.
V-F Day +1 game thread: July 11, Braves at Rockies
I’m just so full of love right now.
Barbaric game thread: July 10, Braves at Rockies
“Hello, I’m Gwinnett first baseman/DH Barbaro Canizares. Is my defense really that bad? Hard to believe. And if it really is that bad, how did you not know this when you signed me? Don’t you people have scouts? Is it something else? Is it my breath? Anyway, please enjoy this video, featuring a young Casey Kotchman.” [Not really. I think.]
Brooks Conrad
Been up for a few days; as a reserve, I like him more as an occasional starter than as a guy who comes off the bench during the game. He doesn’t profile as a pinch-hitter, as he hasn’t hit for average (career minor league BA .261, career AAA BA .248) but compensates with secondary skills (.343 career OBP, .467 career SLG). Basically, he’s not the guy you want hitting with a runner on second and two out.
Read the rest of this entry »Accountable game thread: June 8, Braves at Cubs
“Hi, this is Braves broadcaster and major league Hall of Famer Don Sutton. I just want to let you know that things have been getting a little slack around here, and I’ll be dropping by from now on to make sure there’s some accountability from you blog people. You’re welcome.”
Continuing game thread: July 7, Braves at Cubs
“Hi, I’m ESPN baseball analyst Steve Phillips, and I am not human. I am a poorly programmed robot sent from the future to destroy ESPN. Unfortunately, I was built by the lowest bidder. Damn, Murdoch is cheap.”
Ursine game thread: July 14, Braves at Cubs
“Hi, I’m Gwinnett Braves outfielder Jordan Schafer. I’m on the shelf right now with a wrist injury, and you know what? It’s been bothering me all year! Of course, I didn’t tell anybody that it was that bad, because (1) I was a rookie and didn’t want to lose my job, and (2) I’m a baseball player, and we never tell the truth about our physical conditions. You would think someone would have noticed, but I guess not. Anyway, in AAA, who cares? So I came clean. Also, I look like Herbie, the Misfit Elf.”
Out at home game thread: July 5, Braves at Nats
“Hi, I’m Braves third base coach Brian Snitker, and I have the depth perception of a one-eyed rhinoceros.”
Small-brained game thread: July 4, Nats at Braves
“Hi, everybody, I’m Braves announcer Chip Caray, and I have a brain the size of a walnut.”
Braves 9, Natinals 8
Welcome, Brooks Conrad! This one was a little more adventurous than I’d like, but the Braves keep finding ways to win, which is nice. They look like a real baseball team all of a sudden.
Read the rest of this entry »Grumpy game thread: July 3, Braves at Nats
I’m Braves announcer Joe Simpson, and I don’t like the way things are today compared to the way they used to be!
Braves 5, Phillies 2
Well, this is phun.
Early, it looked like a classic Vazquez start—Javy was dealing, and the Braves were squandering scoring opportunities. (In the bottom of the 2nd, Escobar, who was finally well enough and far enough out of the doghouse to start, led off with a double, and Diaz followed with a bunt single to put runners on the corners with none out. Stenchy, predictably, struck out swinging on a mediocre, down-the-middle fastball. After Kotchman walked to load the bases, Vazquez struck out and Blanco grounded out to end the threat.)
Read the rest of this entry »High-flying game thread: July 3, Phillies at Braves
“Hi, I’m Atlanta Braves outfielder Jeff Francoeur. Have you accepted Delta into your life? Delta has a wonderful plan for you…”
Not that July is likely to be any better game thread: July 1, Phillies at Braves
“Hi, I’m Atlanta Braves outfielder Jeff Francoeur, and I put my lucky underwear on one leg at a time like everyone else.”
